[4.00/10] Mission London (2010)

Mission London (2010)

I've been writing movie reviews since 2004, but I've never ever reviewed a Bulgarian movie. Till now. The main reason I haven't done this is because BG cinema truly and honestly sucks. It's the same case with "Mission London" - the most successful film in Bulgarian cinematic history. Making over € 1.3 million at the domestic box office, it can be considered as the first-ever Bulgarian blockbuster. The craze and the hype over "Mission London" was tremendous here, but for me, it didn't meet expectations at all. It unfolds around Varadin, a Bulgarian ambassador, who arrives at his new posting in London, a few days earlier than expected and finds the embassy in disarray and no preparations in place to celebrate Bulgaria's accession into the EU. Under pressure from Madame Selianova, the President's wife, and a patron of the event, Varadin's political standing rests on him ensuring the Queen attends the concert. But with corrupt staff, criminal gangs operating out of the kitchen, falling in love with a stripper and a little misunderstanding with a PR firm that provides look-alike royalties - his simple task turns into a chaotic nightmare. "Mission London" mostly suffers from tired and unoriginal premise, total lack of focus, incoherent plot, overacting and flat jokes. Plus, it has too many (and unengaging) characters, most of which remain completely undeveloped. Performances-wise, "Mission London" fails to make a great impression as well. The acting from UK cast is pretty decent though. Alan Ford is the only internationally famous face here, and he does a good job as Sibling, thanks to his undoubtedly strong screen presence. Tomas Arana, who co-starred in Ridley Scott's "Gladiator" is passable, yet unmemorable as Munroe. Rosemary Leach as the 'fake' queen of Britain is probably the only funny character in the entire movie. Unfortunately, all the Bulgarian actors do a terrible job, with the exception of veteran actor Slavcho Peev, who's charm and positive aura that lightens up the screen in every scene he appears. Our miserable actors display their horribly pathetic acting skills and prove yet again that they are not suitable for movies, but only for theatrical productions, as their acting is so overstated, that they often make their characters look like cartoon heroes. Julian Vergov is mediocre as always and he just can't carry a movie. Ana Papadopulu not only has a laughably terrible accent, but she totally sucks as an actress. Lyubomir Neikov, a popular BG comedian, who's usually funny and hilarious to watch, fails to provide many genuine laughs for the audience. Carla Rahal, who looks like a fat cow, is there just to eat things and to annoy the audience with her horrible shrilly voice. Koceto Kalki is such a clown, I barely stand him. Ernestina Shinova's acting is hideously over-the-top and exaggerated to the max. On a positive note, "Mission London" is pretty decent in terms of visuals. Dimitar Mitovski's direction is overall pretty good - he uses a great variety of camera angles, and the photography and cinematography are also impressive, at least for our standards. Having said that, "Mission London" lack a competent editing. And an incoherent plot combined with poor editing is a simply a disaster. Nicely-shot, yet unoriginal, messily-structured and painfully unfunny, "Mission London" is the first-ever Bulgarian blockbuster I'm so NOT proud of.